"It's the deeds, Mal, that make the difference between mean and truly evil. When I was your age, I was cursing entire kingdoms."
"See, I'm just, just trying to teach you the thing that really counts... how to be me."
"Oh! There's news! I buried the lede. You four have been chosen to go to a different school... In Auradon."
"You will go. You will find Fairy Godmother and you will bring back the magic wand. Easy peasy."
"It's all about you and baby. Do you enjoy watching innocent people suffer?"
"Well, then get me the wand and you and I can see all that and so much more. And with that wand and my scepter, I will be able to bond both good and evil to my will!"
"What is wrong with you all? People used to cower at the mention of our names! For 20 years, I have searched for a way off this island. For 20 years, they have robbed us from our revenge... revenge on Snow White and her horrible little men."
"Revenge on Aladdin and his bloated genie!"
"Revenge on every sneaky dalmatian that escaped your clutches."
"And I, Maleficent...The evilest of them all, I will finally have my revenge on sleeping beauty and her relentless little prince. Villains!"
"My spell book. My book. I need my... that book. Oh, ah! The safe. The safe. Queen, help me! I never can figure this thing out."
"It doesn't work here, but it will in Auradon. Remember? When we were spreading evil and ruining lives."
"And now you will be making your own memories by doing exactly as I tell you."
"The future of the free world rests on your shoulders. Don't blow it."
"Can I please see a remote? Is this thing on? Ugh, It's broken. Ugh! I hate electronic equip... Oh!"
"Don't you mean the weeds?"
"Still doing tricks with eggplants?"
"You really couldn't give Cinderella till one A.M.? I mean, really. What, the hamsters had to be back on their little wheels?"
"You sure I can't see you before that? I don't know what I'll do If I don't get my hands on that magic wan... you... you little nugget that I love so much."
"I want that wand!"
"Meanwhile, my girl duped a prince, and she's this close to grabbing the magic wand."
"Villains, our revenge begins today."
"Don't blow it, kiddo."
"She's funny. Oh! I'm so... you're very funny. Here. Wand me. Chop chop. No!"
"Evil like me, don't you wanna be mean... "
"The horns, the horns!"
"Falling in love is weak... And ridiculous. It's not what you want."
"Oh, obviously. I've had years and years and years and... Years of practice being evil. You'll get there."
"I know one thing, young lady. You have no room for love in your life!"
"I hardly think so. Frankly, this is tedious and very immature. Give me the wand. Give me the wand!"